I'm really afraid this post will not even come close to conveying what actually happened during my spring break this year, but I hope somehow my words can formulate a little of all that was experienced.
I've always considered myself a deep thinker. One who enjoys bending reality in a way that provokes philosophical thought and pondering. I love to marvel over the simple things and make a big deal about what is so easily taken for granted by all of humanity. I was afraid I was going to struggle at the wheel during the drive since we left at 10pm, but I have never been more energetic on a drive home before. Almost every sentence out of our mouths began with either "Isn't it weird how..." or "Have you guys ever thought of..." and the typical response to whatever it was would be something like "whoa... that's awesome" or "man... God is really amazing." And before we knew it, God had snuck up on us. From one thing to the next, everything we talked about somehow seemed to point back to how incredible our God is and how much we will never grasp or understand about His being. That ride home goes down as one of the greatest conversations I've ever had.
We didn't know it at the time, but this was causing an unexpected shift inside each of our hearts. Instead of sleeping non-stop and watching movies all day, we discovered a new dynamic in our conversations and we were suddenly thirsty to know more about the Lord. We asked each other question after question... not really looking for actual answers but allowing our minds to be stretched and our hearts to be cracked open... just enough to let Him breathe a fresh breath inside of us and stir up the passions and longings we'd allowed to become dormant for so long. I can't really describe what was happening. But whatever it was... we definitely were not looking for it.
We spent time with my parents. Justeen asked them so many meaningful questions every chance she got and I probably learned more about my family than I'd ever tried to know before. We laughed until we couldn't breathe. We stayed up until all hours of the night. But we didn't do any of the things we thought we would. And so many more things we never expected we'd want to do.
Without really meaning to, we ended up praying together every night before going to bed. Each night the prayers got longer and more intensely powerful. We began pouring things out in front of each other that each of us individually probably hadn't prayed by ourselves in a very long time, if at all. We went through names and names of people we longed to see come to Christ. We prayed for each other and for our relationships and for God to make use of us in our seemingly small lives. After we'd finish praying there was always this extra strong bond felt between us. Like we'd just fought a battle side by side. We began talking about things we could do to make an impact over our break instead of being lazy and unproductive. We made dinner for a family in our church and were told very specifically that we had been an answer to prayer. There's nothing quite like hearing someone say that you were the one God had in mind to use when that person prayed for something.
If I tried to explain every moment we experienced over this break it would take hours and hours of writing and hours and hours for you to read. The basic reality is that God showed up in a big way in our hearts this spring break. And the most amazing part about it is that we weren't even looking for Him. He just decided to show up and give us a good shaking up like only He can do.
One of my greatest prayers during the week was that He would instill within me a desire for Him that goes beyond any emotion. I didn't want that break to simply be a spiritual high of sorts and to come back to school and forget all about it. It transformed a lot of how I pray and how much time I spend in the Word. As crazy as this may sound, it is almost April and I am three days ahead in my Bible reading plan. Typically I am way behind at this point but I have been excited to get into it and really search out the Scriptures. Since we've been back Justeen has not stopped asking me to tell her Bible stories. It's been so amazing discussing the random stories of the Bible with my friends and just letting it soak inside us while we read and talk about it.
There was a reason for why God chose to invade our spring break like He did. I don't want it to be in vain and even when the emotion and feeling has died away I want to continue cultivating a deeper relationship with Christ and also with the incredible friends He has blessed me with.
Neither Florida nor New York could have compared to spring break 2011 in Plainfield, Indiana.
1 comment:
I am so proud of you! You are such an amazing young woman! I can't wait to see the future God has planned for you:) Love to you from all of us!
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